This week has been emotionally tough. I haven’t been in the mood to write or even open up my documents to begin the process. I had nothing to write about and nothing to share. I was not in a good place at all. I talked to my mother earlier and she told me about the Woman and The judge and how through the Woman’s persistence she was able to accomplish her goal. It was the word persistence that struck me. It is interesting how you need to be persistent to be consistent. You have to push through feelings. You can not quit. The will to be persistent is the drive that leads to consistency.
Every day it will feel like you are tearing down brick walls named, “I don’t FEEL like it” or “I am not in the mood”. Somedays those walls won’t even be knocked down and you will slip back into inconsistency. But true persistency is when you get back up and you fight harder. Each time you get knocked down, fight. Every time you run into a wall, fight. Fight to win and don’t give up.
I am a perfectionist. It is hard for me to finish projects because they can always be better. Being a perfectionist also contributes to my inconsistency and procrastination. I put so much pressure on myself to do something great or just be the best. An example that I struggle with is reading the Bible and praying. I don’t stay consistent because I always pressure myself to read every day or I condemn myself a bad Christian. It does feel good the days when I do read the bible and I pray. It feels like a weight off of my shoulder but the hard part is reaching my own expectations for me. I am always trying to be this perfect version of myself at the expense of myself. I’ve noticed that being a perfectionist has inhibited me to have peace within my mind and with myself. I don’t feel free. I am critical of everything and I hold myself back. I wait to have all of my ducks in a row until I can do something that I want to do. So what is the point of being a perfectionist?
It isn’t healthy and there aren’t results. It affects hobbies and things that I would want to progress in. There isn’t a need for it anymore. If you are anything like me you may have these symptoms as well from being a perfectionist.
Here are some reasons why perfectionism isn’t healthy:
- Not Authentic (meaning no peace)
- Inconsistent because you put too much pressure on yourself
- Procrastination/Never completing tasks
- You hold yourself back because you wait for all your ducks to be in a row
- You’ll never be at your best
Again, there isn’t any worth to keep picking at yourself and plus it is not your place to judge anyone including yourself.
-Stop condemning yourself
-Learn to let go of the control and give it to a higher power
-Accept yourself and know that it will all work in your favor
Once we take these steps and learn how to be free life will be so much better. 🙂
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