So What am I doing Again….

First of all let me start out by saying that i’ve gotten out of the habit of reading my bible and I need to get back in because God has been granting me some awesome moments in time such as just enjoying coffee and getting extras on food. I am very happy that I have been showed favor for this time even though I have been feeling like there is not a light at the end of the tunnel.  I want everyone to feel his favor and especially those who are going through the same things that I go through because it is nice to know that someone else is going through or has gone through the same thing.

Today was one of those days of favor but right now I am not talking about favor. I am talking about gifts and talents. Again I am speaking of writing. Writing is something that is very hard for me to do yet I have been told many times that I was good at it. This does not make my writing the main thing I am good at but it is a big portion of my life right now. It seems like writing helps me because I have to actually sit down and pour out all of my feelings.  I feel like I do not write enough.

Usually when I write I gain some type of new found wisdom that I have had before. My writing is also inspired by my time with God (something I also need to do more). I feel like most of my time is gone to worrying about school and what I am suppose to do that I am numb to anything else. It is like I lack imagination when I write fiction or I can not get something out like I would like.  On top of the anxiety coming from school wanting to know what I am suppose to do in life there is that anxiety of breaking free from an idea that I need translated into the natural world.

I do believe that translation of an idea in a creative manner so then the fullness of the messages can be displayed is the ultimate form of transferring spirit to the other dimension. When we put our heart and soul into something that is transferring something from the spiritual world into the actual world.

This translation process is my main problem. I feel like I can not pull out everything that I have with in me properly and it gives me great anxiety and a restless spirit.  I really want it all to be pulled out of me because it weighs me down.

I do not actually have to have everything perfect and I do have time for everything to be up to the standards it needs to be.

“Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;do not fret—it leads only to evil.”

Psalm 37:8

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