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I remember one time doing research on the flag and it seems like a pretty awesome flag. It has meanings behind each color and just seems like a great life and good people to be around.  It did not matter who you are if you were an outsider you were welcomed into this group whereas Christians put up a wall most of the time or either I haven’t went to the right church yet.

Let me start out by saying I will still support the LGBT group as a straight woman because we need to be more ethical but I do not support same sex marriage or the arresting of any religious leaders if they do not comply with government laws….separation of church and state.

I was once a bisexual female. Did I pray the “gay away” no, no such thing has happened. I have always felt conflicted internally by my sexuality. I really liked women and men but to be blunt no one was going to waste their time on me because the good looking men were either taken or gay and the women had the same thing going on.  Most Lesbians do not like bisexual women. I was already considered the scum of the earth by societal standards because I was black, curvy, smart and being bisexual was just the icing on the cakes.

The most conflicting thing for me internally was marriage. I never wanted to get married for real and marriage I could have honestly cared less for. I was going into Bible College with the intentions of becoming a pastor (owning a church but I believe that this idea is changing) and with becoming a pastor I was going to have to deal with the marriage issue. Do I marry same sex couples? I didn’t want to marry anyone at all because I disliked weddings but I couldn’t do that.

It felt so hard being christian and loving God but yet being a part of a society that would say that christians were bigoted. The reality of it all is that yes, being gay, bisexual, trans and other non straight preferences is a sin but one sin does not trump the other. Each sin should be treated as a sin. Sin is an illusion that turns into an identity crisis and keeps us lost. We never treat people as lost and looking for purpose and meaningful lives because we as christians are also lost within this facade.

Really? who thinks about living for Christ and being a disciple? We are so busy bashing on others that we are blind to our own faults. Some are even in an identity crisis. Some don’t even know who God is. Some don’t even take this walk seriously. It was not until I wanted to kill myself and look for purpose where I learned about how dormant humanity is. When we are in a relationship with Christ and seek his validation that is when we will do the right thing. It does not require us to force others into doing so.

When we truly want something for ourselves and love God things will change. As humans we have to understand free will. We can only do so but when judgement comes we can not vindicate for anyone not even ourselves.

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